One of the things no one prepared me for was hearing the word “no.” Not in the sense of “No, you can’t have that new toy,” I was more than comfortable hearing my mother say that through gritted teeth. What I’m referring to is the “No, I’m sorry we don’t want to hire you” or “No, I’m sorry I don’t want you back” or “No, I’m sorry you do not qualify for this apartment.” I’m talking about those painful “no’s” that come with adulthood.
Rejection is something we all should be familiar with, it’s that unspoken part of life we all expect. All those graduation speeches and Pinterest boards tell us “No matter what, don’t give up!” however…. I still found myself crumbling when one rejection turned into several. How do you really cope with being told your best is not good enough? How do you handle that door being closed in your face, knowing the situation is completely out of your control? How do you walk away without your self esteem hanging in jeopardy?
The honest truth is you give yourself a whole hell of a lot of time. I could sit here and tell you to not worry about it and be happy, but then I’d be giving you useless advice. Honestly, hearing no hurts! Your pride takes a hit, you question yourself, you may even avoid all responsibilities for one day while your spirit recoups (my personal fav) You have to let yourself feel it, but then you have to heal it.
So you got told no…. we all have to deal with it. Maybe that opportunity wasn’t for you, maybe it just wasn’t your time, maybe you did everything right and that other person just wasn’t feeling it. Whatever the outcome, it’s OKAY. Everyone won’t like you, everything won’t be for you, but you cannot let that change who you are. The greatest of the greats heard no before, yet they used that as fuel not as a reason to quit. Oprah was fired, Lauryn Hill was booed at the Apollo, and many doubted Beyoncé would ever make it beyond Destiny’s Child, but they did it ANYWAYS. That’s what it’s all about.
It’s hard to dust yourself off sometimes, and it may take you a while. The only thing that matters is that you do it! Understand that greater is waiting for you, and this isn’t the end. In order to get anywhere in life, you have to leave the door open just as wide for opportunity as you do rejection. It’s scary, but it builds you.
So take a deep breath. You’re not the only one and you WILL make it. I bet your next “yes” is right around the corner!